Friday, February 26, 2010

Why do I procrastinate?

I have always struggled with procrastination. When I was in school I would always put off papers until the last minute. My procrastination now has carried over into my personal life. Most recently it has manifested itself in my car inspection. I am not sure why I struggle so much with getting my car inspected. I have lived in NY for almost my whole life. It is common knowledge that you need to get your car inspected once a year and the sticker is right in front of your face at all times letting you know when you have to have it done by. Yet, for some reason, I always procrastinate about getting it done. I don't know why. This year my excuse was that I didn't know where to go in Syracuse to get it inspected. The one place we have gone to to have our car serviced was not in the nicest neighborhood. It was summer and Glenn had dropped it off, ridden his bike to school and then ridden his bike back to pick it up. He said he thought that they might have had an old van seat sitting there for people while they waited. I have 4 kids. They are not all going to fit on an old van seat. I don't think that there is anything for us to do in that neighborhood either.

I got a recommendation from a friend for a place to get my car inspected and called on Wednesday. They said that they thought that they could get me in on Thursday if I left my van there and they would be able to run me home after I dropped it off first thing in the morning. That was the original plan until I woke up Thursday to lots of snow. I gave them a call and they said they would not be able to take Glenn to school after he dropped it off because they were dealing with snow plowing as well as the normal business at their shop. They told me to try again on Friday. I had really not wanted to get the inspection done today because it is Lydia's 6th birthday and wanted today to be a fun day for her. Over night we got even more snow (about 7 inches since I had shoveled at 11 last night.) When I called again this morning there was no way they would be able to take Glenn to school after he dropped it off. To complicate matters Abigail started throwing up last night at around 8pm and is still pretty miserable even though she hasn't vomited since 4:30. Even if I had someone (I think I would need 2 someones - one to watch the kids and one to give me a ride home from the shop and back there) I don't know that anyone really wants to subject themselves to Abigail's germs. I have called around a few places but they all say I have to leave my vehicle and I have no idea what to do with my kids, especially the sick one who is pretty much not moving, for the time that it takes for them to get to my car and get it inspected which it sounds like will be several hours.

So.... I guess we'll have to wait until March to get our car inspected. I hate to do that because it is illegal and, though I don't think that there are any problems, if there is our sticker gets scraped and we have to drive illegally until it gets fixed. I hate to do that. Still not sure what to do. One thing I do know is that next year I am going to get my car inspected the first week on the month, not the last, Lord willing.

Another thing I procrastinate on is birthdays. I know when my kids birthdays are, they are even each near the end of the month, but I don't get my act together enough to organize actual birthday parties for them or buy gifts. I feel really bad about that. Lydia has changed her mind lots of times about what kind of cake she wants (the final answer as of this minute is Dinosaur Train - how on earth do you make a Dinosaur Train cake?). Many of the people she wants to invite live in Rochester. I have not planned ahead and therefore I have nothing planned for her birthday (which is, of course, today). I know that she wants Hawaiian Haystacks for her birthday dinner but I don't have the ingredients for it because I have procrastinated going to the grocery store. It all comes down to procrastination.

I don't want to procrastinate any more! Just like my grades suffered and my health suffered (being tired from all nighters) when I was in school now my family suffers because of my procrastination. I am going through Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow again and this week she quoted Ephesians 5:15-17 from the Phillips translation. It said, "Live life, then, with a due sense of responsibility, not as [women] who do not know the meaning [and purpose of] life but as those who do. Make the best use of your time, despite all the evils of these days. Don't be vague but grasp firmly what you know to be the will of the Lord." This has been a challenge to me and now it is in my face. I want to live life on purpose and to plan ahead, not spend my life putting out fires and getting stressed out because of my lack on planning. Lord, please help me to be careful how I live, "not as unwise but as wise, making the most of my time."

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