The kids really needed to go to bed tonight, I really needed them to go to bed tonight. Caleb was still working on supper dishes when I started doing "thank yous" with the girls and Glenn in the living room and he got there just as I was starting to read Matthew 14. I got to verses 16 and 17 "But Jesus replied, 'That isn't necessary - you feed them.' 'What!' they exclaimed. 'We have exactly five small loaves of bread and two fish!'" and started crying. Caleb turned to Glenn and asked him if he had picked out what we were going to read tonight and Glenn told him that no, that was just where we were at. Caleb said, "God must have known." After I composed myself and finished the passage Caleb turned to me and said, "You see mom, if God can use five loaves and two fish to feed five thousand men and that's not including women and children then He can provide for us."
I have been struggling with trusting God. I have been struggling with the whole "where are we going to be living next week" thing and then today I realized I hadn't calculated health insurance for Glenn into my projected budget for our family. The kids are eligible for Child Health Plus in NY so they will be taken care of but Glenn and I are not and he is required to have health insurance or he can't be a student. It is going to cost us a lot of money that I had not calculated in on my budgeting. It was a surprise to me and I said, "What! We have exactly 5 loaves of bread and 2 small fish" and God said in vs 18 "Bring them here." OK, God, here are my 5 loaves of bread and 2 small fish. They are Yours. You know our needs over the next 4 years until we get another paycheck again better than I do and You know how You are going to use what we have and what ever else You have up Your sleeve to provide for us. I can trust You.